Relationship Counseling + Blended Families

Are you a couple wanting to rebuild a sense of partnership, trust, and connection? I work with couples who are wanting to increase their sense of vulnerability, partnership and security with one another.  Some couples come to counseling in response to a recent crisis such as threatening divorce or an infidelity.  Others will come to work through an ongoing problem or to be preventative and maintain their closeness and partnership. 

 

I also enjoy working with couples who are blending families, becoming stepparents, and navigating being previously divorced.  As a stepparent myself, I understand the extra layers of complexity in these dynamics. I use Emotion-Focused Therapy and the Gottman Method as well as my experience as a stepparent to inform my practice. 

 

Relationships need consistent, stable care like we do as individuals. If we feel stable and secure in our relationships, most conflicts will feel like blips on the radar as opposed to giant tsunamis or being one argument away from a separation.  Sue Johnson, the founder of Emotion-Focused Therapy said, “Most fights are really protests over emotional disconnection.” She points out in her treatment that often when a marriage fails it isn’t because of conflict though; it’s the decreasing affections and lack of emotional responsiveness that is often the cause. 

 

Whether you’re newly married or have been married a long time, get along pretty well or have been high-conflict or distant with each other, couples therapy can be a helpful tool to use to keep your relationship thriving and nurtured. 

 

Book Recommendations to supplement therapy:

 

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by Gottman

The Five Love Languages by Chapman

Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts by Parrott

Attached by Levine & Heller

How to Win as a Stepfamily by Visher

Stepcoupling by Wisdom & Green

The Smart Stepmom by Petherbridge & Deal

Heather Lokteff, LPC  

Licensed Professional Counselor for Pre-teens, Adolescents, Adult Individuals - Marriage and Couples Therapy - Telehealth Counseling - Online Therapy

4800 Meadows Rd, Suite 300, Lake Oswego, OR 97035.

Also serving clients from Tigard, West Linn, Portland, Tualatin, Sherwood, Beaverton, and Oregon